It All Ends Today
by megHan5
Summary: After 'Spectacular Spectacular' Satine barely survives her own suicide. Finally, Christian and Satine are able to leave Paris for good but now the question is, 'what will happen once they do?'
1. Chaptre Un

It all ends today  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in my story or the movie Moulin Rouge. (I do want to meet Ewan McGregor, though)  
  
Dedication: This story is dedicated to Steph and Kim; my loyal readers, critics and friends.  
  
"You're dying, Satine." Those words hit me like ice, chilling my body and spirit, cutting me to the core. AS if to emphasize the point, the cold grip of my illness introduced itself and I began coughing. I managed to spit out a fleeting question, anything to prove that Harold had been lying. "Another trick Harold?"  
  
"No, love the doctor told us." Marie nodded in agreement. He hadn't been. My world crashed in on me, bringing with it the little hopes and dreams that I had been allowed in this dark place. Blackness threatened my vision as I became even more lightheaded, the only words my shocked brain could produce, echoing on my lips.  
  
"I'm dying." I fell into a chair and stayed there for what seemed like hours. My scarred and shattered soul sang out into the darkness. "I was a fool to believe. Yes a fool to believe. It all ends today, yes it all ends today." And truly it would. Everything I had come to know dear. Christian, actual true love, freedom; all would be given up to the Duke for fame and fortune. I had no choice.  
  
Mechanically, numbly, I got up out of my chair and stepped over to the closet. I had to tell him. Harold was right, there was no other way. I would tell him I didn't love him. Betray myself and my heart to save him. He just wouldn't understand what I was doing until it was too late.  
  
I had no other choice. The cards were stacked against me. I closed my eyes and invited the darkness in, relishing in the peace it provided.  
  
As I opened my eyes, my attention was brought to a single ring out of many on my dresser. Much more modest than the others, it stood out like a sore thumb. A small, delicate, gold band with a single tiny emerald embedded in it. My mother's wedding ring. My father gave it to me after she passed away; it had taken him a year and a half's wages to pay for it. Father always said that the emerald made him think of my mothers eyes. Mabie that's why he gave me the ring, too many memories to haunt him. But even with the pain it created, that ring was his favorite possession. He told me that although he never had enough money for himself, he managed to save up for it; even when time wasn't on his side and the cards were stacked against him. I asked how he triumphed even though 'the cards weren't in his favor'. He told me, " When the deck is stacked against me, I just play a different game."  
  
That was exactly it. I'd just play a different game. I would go to Christian, and tell him. Deceive him, break his heart. But I wouldn't sleep with the Duke; I wouldn't die feebly and weakly. I would die pure in Christian's eyes, unmarred by the man he despised and he would recover and go on with his life. I would not be the Duke's whore.  
  
"It all ends today, yes, it all ends today." I sang again, a new resolution resonating in my soul. I walked slowly over to the other end of my small room and looked through my wardrobe until I found the perfect thing. A dress befitting a grieving widow. And, truly, I was grieving. Grieving for the loss of my very heart and soul.  
  
But I would do it anyway. That's what Harold taught me, to do things against my morals and conscience. If I hadn't learned how to smother that little voice in the back of my mind, I wouldn't have gotten half as far in this underworld as I am today, if I survived at all.  
  
I would do it. I would be the great actress. I would save both of us. I looked in to my mirror and pinned a hat on with a black pearl pin. As I pulled the raven netting of the hat over my face and blood-red lips, I sang out to the rising sun.  
  
"Inside my heart is breaking, my make-up may be flaking, but my smile still stays on." The show must go on; and indeed, it would. 


	2. Chaptre Deux

As I walked to the small garret that my love occupied, the freezing cold rain seemed to echo my mood. I seemed to get there faster than ever, faster than I wanted to. My footsteps betraying my heart. I lingered outside of his door, hoping that the nightmare would end and I wouldn't have to fulfill the ending. I prayed that I would wake up smiling in his arms. But no such solution provided itself. I took a deep breath and walked through the doorway.  
  
There stood Christian, smiling at me, his blue eyes gleaming hopefully. Little did he know what was about to befall him. He looked at me confused, seeing me clothing and lack of baggage.  
  
"What, what's wrong?" he asked me.  
  
No matter what my heart was telling me, my brain persevered.  
  
"After you left, the Duke came to me." I lied, "He offered me everything. Everything I've ever dreamed of. He has one condition; I must never see you again. I'm sorry." Confusion and hurt filled his face, creating that pitiful puppy dog face I loved and hated so much.  
  
"What are you talking about?"  
  
"You knew who I was." This conversation made just as much sense to him as it did to me.  
  
"What are you saying? What about last night? What we said?" Last night.......how I wished I could forget that it ever happened......that he ever ..... my thoughts stopped cold. 'Do your job, Diamond' I reminded myself.  
  
"I don't expect you to understand. The difference between you and I is, you can leave anytime you choose. This is my home." I repeated it as if to make myself believe it. "The Moulin Rouge is my home." Christian's brain struggled to comprehend what I was saying, how I could betray him so. And it showed on his handsome face.  
  
Tears choked up my throat, preventing me from telling the truth, what I so wanted him to hear. Tears that prevented me from having the flawless character, from being the perfect actress. He saw my mistake.  
  
"No. There must be something else.....this, this can't be real!" I saw his contorted face and instantly regretted looking. 'No Christian,'I thought, 'There's no waking up from this nightmare. I'm sorry. ' He asked me again, running up to me so his face was inches from mine. I tried to escape. "There's something the matter", his voice was strong and sure, "Tell me what it is. Tell me what's wrong. Tell me the truth! Tell me the truth!" Christian screamed at me, taking my wrist and throwing me against the doorframe. I was feeble and weak only for a second. 'Never drop character' I silently scolded. I composed myself, and once again became the Sparkling Diamond.  
  
"The truth?" I looked him straight in the eye. "The truth is I am the Hindi courtesan and I choose the Maharajah." I drew sudden strength from the Diamond. "That's how the story really ends." I couldn't let myself see the damage I had caused. I ran.  
  
The rain seemed to sob with me as I let it drench me, let it consume me. I had done it. I was now the Diamond, and she was I. I had become the actress. From my tear-stained eyes I saw the windmill turning. That had once meant freedom to me, it had seemed open and forgiving. Now it meant slavery, signified prison.  
  
The pain of what I had done to Christian was overwhelming, looming over every movement. As I stood once again looking in my mirror, I heard his screams. The voice was unmistakable. A voice full of pain and betrayal.  
  
"Satine! Satine!" it screamed. The voice became silent, but it's suffering could never be stifled. But, he wouldn't suffer for long. He would see that I would not become the Duke's, but stay forever his. I would die tonight. Christian would soon understand. All would be revealed. 


	3. Chaptre Trois

Disclaimer: I don't own Moulin Rouge or any of the characters in this story. (I do want to meet Ewan McGregor, though)  
  
A/N: This chapter is a little smaller than the others (I think) are. Anyway, hope it is enjoyed.  
  
Christian sat on his bed, wrapped in a blanket, staring blankly out the window. His heart had been shattered by the one person who had loved him. Supposedly loved him. Her faced haunted his mind. She had smiled. She had smiled when she ripped his heart out and fed it to the dogs. She had shown him how naive and stupid he really was, to actually believe that she loved him, to trust her. He remembered her words the first night they had met. "Christian", she had said, "I'm a courtesan. I make men believe what they want to believe."  
  
'But I still fell for her.' Christian lowered his head in shame. 'I still believed that I could change her that love would conquer all.' He picked up the nearest object, an empty bottle of absinthe and threw it at the wall. "They used me!!!" He screamed. "They used me, and now I'll be cast aside like everything else. How could I believe she loved me."  
  
'I had always told her she was a wonderful actress. And she proved me right. She did her job so very well.' Christian resumed staring out the window at the wretched Moulin Rouge. The club of his dreams had turned into his worst nightmare. If looks could destroy, the windmill would have been a fiery pile of ash in seconds. He continued staring numbly, blankly. Until something interrupted his pain. And then magnified it. Toulouse walked into the tiny room, intent on making Christian believe what he already knew. Satine still loved him.  
  
He started to talk to Christian, but he ignored all of it. Still, Toulouse continued speaking to him. Christian sat gritting his teeth, trying to keep his friends words from entering his brain and becoming logic. But he did not succeed entirely.  
  
"Things are not always as they seem." Toulouse concluded, staring at Christian. Christian heard this remark and his bitter mind and heart retorted. "Things are exactly as they seem." He said in an icy, calm tone. Toulouse wouldn't let him win that easily.  
  
"Christian, you may see me only as a drunken, vice ridden gnome whose only friends are pimps and girls of the brothel, but I know about art and love. If only because I long for it with every fiber of my being." He continued staring at Christian, hoping his speech had sunk in. "She loves you, I know it. I know she loves you." It all made too much sense to Christian, and he didn't want it to. He didn't' want logic.  
  
"Go away, Toulouse, leave me alone." He said, still not looking at his friend. "Go away." he repeated. Toulouse only appeared a little phased by this and stayed at Christian's side, giving him a pitying look. Christian didn't want pity. "GO AWAY!!!!!" he yelled, uncharacteristically. Toulouse just paused, looked at his friend and left. Left Christian to himself, his pain, and his thoughts.  
  
Christian's mind began racing and Toulouse's words starting clicking in his head. His once rock solid opinions and thoughts, the only things he was sure about, he now doubted. Toulouse had filled his mind with doubt and there was only one way to be sure. Christian knew what he had to do. 


	4. Chaptre Quatre

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in this story except for the driver. I don't own Moulin Rouge.  
  
A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed !!!!!!!!! Reviews make me feel warm and fuzzy. Thanks to Rebel Princess and Clones_for_breakfast for helping me w/this chapter.  
  
I peeked around the corner of the windmill, saw that there was no one in sight, and hurriedly ran towards an empty carriage I saw. It had taken much effort to get un-noticed from my dressing room to the gardens of the Moulin Rouge, but I had done it. After all, it was 5:00p.m. on opening night, and they had not even rehearsed the new ending twice. The cast was in a panic, but I had hardly noticed. My poet had been hurt, that was all that mattered. I had intentionally hurt him, damaged him beyond repair and he would only find out why after it was too late. 'C'est La Vie' she whispered to the wind as she climbed into the carriage.  
  
"Where to?" I heard a kind voice say. My mind reeled. 'Where would I find what I was looking for?' I thought, 'no one would in good conscience take me there, to find my own demise.' While Satine was lost in her thoughts the man came to her window and looked in on her.  
  
"Miss? What....." the man suddenly trailed off seeing her face. "Say?" he continued, "Are you from around here?" he asked gesturing to the windmill and surrounding area. I stared at him and nodded an affirmative. The man smiled at the fact that he had managed to get through to his obviously disturbed passenger.  
  
"I've seen you before......." he trailed off, and you could see the wheels turning in his head. Satine just looked at him with glazed eyes. As if the light bulb had just turned on, he put his finger up in the air and shouted, "Why, you're the Sparkling Diamond! I knew that I'd seen you before!" The man started rambling about how he'd been going to the Moulin Rouge for a long time, and she was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen and how he couldn't have dreamed the he'd ever have the 'Sparkling Diamond' in his carriage.  
  
I managed to quiet him by putting my hand on his arm and giving him a rather large, and rather fake smile. An idea had just decided to join me. "Yes," I started, "I'm looking for a place where I can buy some pills." The man gave me a quizzical look. "What kind of pills?" I stifled a laugh, for effect, and looked the kindly old man straight in the eye. "Why, poison ones." I put on an innocent look and watched the man's face change abruptly to a look of horror. If I hadn't learned to control my emotions so well, I would have burst out laughing at the sight. He started backing away and shaking his hands in front of him.  
  
'Christian would have found it funny.' I found myself thinking. 'If Christian was here, I wouldn't have to do this. Things would be better everything would be better if only...........' I was brought back to reality by, you guessed it, the driver.  
  
"I don't want to get involved in anything illegal, now." He stammered.  
  
"No." I responded and giggled, "They're for the show. The new show at the Moulin Rouge?" Well, it was partly true, anyway. "You see, there are rats in the theatre they've been eating any and all food that's left behind. We don't want them to bother the ticket holders, so we were going to put the poison in some food and leave it out for them."  
  
'Oh, great job' my brain responded, 'Wonderful excuse, rats! You can do better than that!'  
  
I quickly banished the thought, as my pitiful excuse had seemed to get through to the driver. And his face filled with relief.  
  
"Oh, well then, Miss, I'm very sorry." The driver said, "You just scared me a bit. I think I might know how to find what you're looking for." The man climbed back into his seat and we were on out way, without any more drama.  
  
The ride seemed to drag on forever, and I was almost wondering whether the driver would take me to where he had promised or straight to the loony bin. I finally decided that sleep would be a wise thing to quiet my mind, but it would not come to my stressed and ragged body. Surprisingly enough, I was calm about what I had decided I would become. I knew it was the only answer, the thing I had to do, and I wouldn't look back.  
  
The carriage stopped and I was jarred out of my thought. I paid the man and quickly walked into the shop, not looking back. I wanted to get this exchange over with as soon as possible. I found the shopkeeper, or, more correctly, he found me. I asked for my object of choice, and watched the flabbergasted shopkeeper, search for words. "It's for rats." I quickly covered up. 'God!', I thought, 'Why can't anyone just comply and not ask questions anymore!' Luckily, my emotions didn't show up on my face. The man relaxed noticeably, like the driver had.  
  
He reached for his ladder and climbed up to a random shelf, and a random, non-discreet bottle. He climbed back down and handed me the bottle. I paid him the ridiculously high amount that he asked and headed towards the door to find another carriage..... 


	5. Chaptre Cinq

Disclaimer: I don't own Moulin Rouge or any of the characters in this story, except for an aforementioned one. (The driver) I'm still waiting to meet Ewan McGregor.  
  
A/N: This chapter was one of the hardest to write so far, hope everyone likes it. Thanks to everyone who reviewed, you guys are great!!!! The song in this chapter is Creed 'Hold Me Now' (I think)  
  
  
  
I found shelter in my room. I sat down heavily in the old chair near the window, closed the curtains, and lit one of the several lamps in my small room. It created a dim environment, which I found quite comforting after the bright afternoon I had ventured out into earlier.  
  
'After all, I am a creature of the night', and the sunlight seemed to be an old friend to me; I occasionally visited it and every so often it found me. But he had changed that. Christian had brought sunlight into my life. Just his name gave me warm feelings and comfort. That's why what I have to do is so hard.  
  
I picked myself up and slowly walked over to my small desk, sitting down in the uncomfortable wooden chair. I opened up one of the right-hand drawers, and began sifting through all of the junk that had managed to accumulate in it. I found a pen and reached towards the other end of the desk and grabbed a piece of paper from the small pile. With that, I began my task. The pen scratched across the paper as I fought back tears. I finished it with a kiss, one final kiss to my poet.  
  
The note was not nearly all I wanted to express to him, but it would do. I folded the note up and stuffed it into a narrow envelope. Finally, I scrawled the word 'Christian' on the front.  
  
Sliding the envelope to the side of the desk, I picked up the bottle of pills I had procured earlier. The lid was unscrewed and the pills in my hand before I knew what had happened. I couldn't think now. I couldn't let myself take another option. There had only been two in the bottle; all that I was told was necessary to do the job required. I held them both in my hand and picked up a small glass of water.  
  
This was it. No turning back. Not now. The man had said that the poison would take a varying amount of time to react with the host, depending on what consumed it. I could only hope that the poison would kick in before the show, or after. No one likes the lead dying in the middle of the performance. I moved the hand holding the pills closer to my mouth. Closer, closer; I could almost taste the bitterness on my tongue.  
  
But I stopped dead in my tracks when I noticed something. Something that I had left there. Something I had sworn to read as soon as I had the chance.  
  
I picked up the folded piece of paper in my pale fingers and stared at it. It was a note from Christian. He gave me one nearly every morning, even when we had been with each other the whole day before. His letters gave me hope, and made me feel wanted and loved. But I hadn't had a chance to read this one yet.  
  
When Chocolat had brought me to him, and we vowed to leave, he had slipped this into the pocket of his jacket. He must have written it when I was in the gothic tower. I had hated to leave him there, with his own doubts, but he promised that he wouldn't get jealous. And I believed him. Slowly, carefully, I opened it.  
  
To the one my heart belongs to,  
  
It isn't often that I say something I can't do, but when I look into your eyes, and you mine, I can't but be completely and totally filled with love and joy, you are my everything. You have my heart, you have my mind, and I can't help but give you as much of myself as I can, because you stir something inside of me, something I've never known before you, and that something is real, true love. Only you can make me feel this way, and I thank you.  
  
There are so many things about you that make me want to fall to my knees, the way you look at me, the way you kiss me and everything is right with the world, your funny faces, the way you're always quick to comfort those who need you. There are really so many things I could say if only I weren't running out of ink. Also remember that you are beautiful, the really, only truly beautiful woman in this world, whether you believe it or not. Every day I know you, is a day I love you more, you are my world.  
  
Forever in adoration,  
  
a poet in love  
  
By now, tears were streaming down my cheek, falling on my numb body. The note had done something I had not let myself do. It made me question. Question my fate, question my decision. I was swimming in emotion, and the pure love I felt for him. For my poet. Could I turn back? Or was I too far gone. My thoughts and emotions burst from my lips into a song, as I wept for myself.  
  
"I cried out 'Heaven save me!' but I'm down to one last breath, and with it let me say, let me say." Salty tears fell into my water glass.  
  
"Hold me now, I'm six feet from the edge and I'm thinking, mabie six feet ain't so far down. Hold me now, I'm six feet from the edge and I'm thinking, mabie six feet ain't so far down."  
  
I looked down at my hand, which contained my possible fate, the two pills. I closed my hand, tightened my grip on the water glass and accepted my choice.  
  
"I'm so sorry Christian." 


	6. Chaptre Six

Disclaimer: I don't own Moulin Rouge or any of the characters in this chapter.  
  
A/N: There is one more chapter after this and then I go on vacation. Just thought I'd inform anyone who cares. I have corrected myself and realized that the song in my last chapter is Creed 'One Last Breath'. Thanks sooo much to my reviewers, you guys keep this story going. Enjoy!  
  
  
  
The only recognizable emotion in Toulouse as he wandered around backstage was confusion. He was confused. Confused why Satine had done what she had done, why Christian had so easily accepted her deceit, why the hell the Duke had to be involved in their lives and the most mind-boggling one of all; why hadn't love prevailed.  
  
He believed that the only thing that could keep you breathing was love. Love for anything, it didn't really matter what. Just love. And Christian and Satine had had love, real true love. The show being only an hour away, Toulouse was in costume and relatively ready to perform. He just had to remember his one line, but when the green fairy was your most loyal houseguest, that could be a very difficult task.  
  
Even through that thick green fog, however, was the confusion. And with that confusion he set to wandering, which put him in his current state of motion. As he was wandering the halls behind the now-theatre dancers scurried searching for lost costume pieces, crew prepared for the worst that could happen, and it was generally alive and buzzing with activity backstage. Except for one person: Satine. Toulouse knew that she must feel guilty for what she had done, anyone would be! He just hoped she wouldn't do anything drastic; the same he hoped for Christian. The bottom line was, he was worried about her.  
  
Toulouse walked up to Satine's dressing room door and after pausing for a moment knocked on the heavy wood.  
  
"Satine?" he asked and knocked again, "Satine, its Toulouse, are you all right?" He didn't have much of an idea of what possessed him to speak those words to her, after all, before Christian they barely had had any contact. He stood there thinking, and realized that she hadn't responded. He had a feeling that something wrong, and he jumped on it.  
  
Toulouse opened the door, where the grief-stricken Satine was sitting on her floor in deep thought. Hearing the door open, she jumped up and ran out of the door, knocking over a glass of water in the process, and running past Toulouse. He stared after her startled and tried to slow her down by yelling her name, but to no avail. Toulouse peered into her dressing room and saw the spilled water, and overturned glass among many other scattered objects. His heart told him to go in, so he did. That was all the explanation needed.  
  
He closed the door softly behind him, and felt the darkness in the room. Albeit, it was night, but the room held a grimness of it's own. A grimness which made his skin crawl. He saw an extremely melted down candle, which shown pale light on the objects of the room. He saw a worn velvet chair, make-up, jewelry, scarves, the overturned water glass and an object which shouldn't fit in the room.......a bottle of pills. Taking a second look he noticed another detail. It was an empty bottle of pills. Toulouse picked up the bottle and read what he could of the label. Regardless of the rest of the words that were printed on the label several stood out to him. CYANIDE. EXTREMELY POISONOUS. He frantically glanced around the dressing room, looking for an explanation. He gasped when his mind found a connection. The glass. The glass had been sitting on the desk next to the pills when he had startled Satine. "No, no, it can't be...she can't..." he mumbled frantically. His mind was filled with many thoughts, the fog of Absinthe lifted. Again, his heart led him somewhere. He wasn't sure why, but he looked to the corner of the dark wooden desk, where a small envelope laid. He picked it up and ran his hands over the front and the still damp ink. Written on it was the word 'Christian'. There was no doubt in his mind that this had been her suicide note, he had written several in his time. Absinthe may cause you great joy and happiness, but it brings you down hard. One solitary thought remained in his head as he heard, "Ten minutes till curtain!" Toulouse fell to his knees, and whispered weakly "She couldn't have..." 


	7. Chaptre Sept

Disclaimer: I don't own Moulin Rouge or any of the characters in this chapter.  
  
A/N: This is the last chapter before I go on vacation for two weeks. Sorry, guys, that's just how it goes. If there are some reviews when I get back I might be moved to put up another chapter immediately. (*hint hint*) Thanks to all who reviewed and happy reading!  
  
  
  
"Bang!" Windows slammed open, ironically to the beat of one of the songs from 'Spectacular, Spectacular!'. He had found a way in, a little small, a little out of the way, and a little unorthodox, but it was still a way in. The music of his play flooded Christian's senses, and the reason he was in the building returned to him. He had to know. That's why he had returned, why he had sold his typewriter, gone through the effort and why he would inevitably find her. He had to know. With that in mind, Christian straightened his collar and began weaving his way through the backstage of the Moulin Rouge  
  
Warner, the Dukes manservant, seemed to have noticed his creative entrance and didn't seem to be as enthusiastic about the plan. Christian quickly flattened himself against a wall, behind pulleys and ropes and waited till the man's footsteps passed by.  
  
"All brawn and no brain." He murmured quietly to himself. He looked around for a moment, just to be safe, and continued on his way. Even with the remodeling and drastic change the Moulin had gone through, Christian could still find Satine's dressing room. And after quickly checking to make sure the money was still in his pocket, he did.  
  
Something stopped Christian dead in his tracks. He heard the chanting onstage intensify, broken only by her lovely angelic voice. He could hear her beautiful voice resonate throughout the theatre. It could have carried his mind to better times, when he was still under her spell, but her song was stopped by the sickness taking hold of her. The audience hardly noticed. Regardless of the way Christian now felt about Satine, he stood watching from back stage, transfixed by her song and her beauty. But nothing lasts forever. Hearing the song end and seeing the curtain close, Christian went on his way.  
  
Christian lurked in the shadows of the hallways, hiding when necessary, making his way towards the last hurdle. The final assurance that he needed, to quell the doubt rising up in his mind and wounded heart. He just needed to hear the words from her mouth. His mind wandered off, as he thought of what she would say.  
  
"Christian, I don't love you. I never have and never will. It was all just a game." She would look at him confidently and hold out her hand. "And if you don't mind, I would appreciate payment for the services I have provided."  
  
He would pull the money out of his pocket, hand it to her, she would smile and say, "Pleasure doing business with you." He would walk away hurt, but satisfied that there was no chance; he couldn't get hurt anymore and love really didn't exist. All these things he knew would happen. He hoped would happen, anyway.  
  
Christian was still winding his way through the halls and had to, in his opinion, hide too much. He knew how unwelcome his face was, for whatever reason, and knew he couldn't keep up what he was doing for much longer without being caught. He had to find some way to disguise himself. Christian looked around, but could find nothing suitable to his purposes.  
  
Just then, luck smiled down on him. The Argentinean, dressed in his sitar player costume, happened to fall right at Christian's feet. He looked around, more than a little confused, but shrugged it off, and took advantage of the situation. He hurriedly took the jacket off of the Argentinean and shrugged it on.  
  
With that partial assurance of his safety, Christian walked into the doorway of Satine's dressing room. She had been coughing, he had heard her and he could see the blood on her hand. He noticed how pale and frail she looked. For one second, Christian started to reach out, to help her, hug her, ask her what was wrong, and comfort her. Strong as that urge was, he quickly stifled it. Satine definitely looked surprised to see him.  
  
He put on his best arrogant and face, and made his voice flat and business like.  
  
"I've come to pay my bill." She just looked at him, held her chin up and walked away.  
  
"You shouldn't be here, Christian. Just leave." Christian turned around and was right on her heels. Satine stopped at a wall to catch her breath, but noticing her stalker was on her way again, spurred her. They quickly walked through the halls of the Moulin Rouge, drawing some attention. Christian didn't care. He pulled her roughly towards him and spoke venom towards her.  
  
"You made me believe that you loved me." He looked her up and down. "Why shouldn't I pay you?" He spit out the word 'pay' like it had just stung him in the mouth.  
  
Satine just breathed heavily and her eyes pleaded with him. "Please go, Christian." Marie yelled at them both, saying Satine needed to be on the stage, but the words flew past Christian's ears. Satine kept running towards her entrance and away from Christian. She, however, ran into a slight block when a medal staircase got in the way, allowing Christian to trap her. Satine felt his warm breath on the back of her neck as he spoke to her.  
  
"You did your job so very, very, well." She found her way up the steps and kept going, not really caring where. Just anywhere away from him. But he was relentless.  
  
"Why can't I pay you like everyone else does?!" He yelled at her. Christian wasn't getting the answer he had wanted, and he kept pressing on. Satine was on the verge of tears, and her body was winded from the chase.  
  
"No Christian, there's no point." She panted. "Just leave." By now, a sizable group of backstage crew had noticed the incident and began to follow the pair, but neither noticed. Christian grabbed at Satine, every time her barely managing to get away. A crewmember grabbed Christian in an attempt to slow him down, but the man was quickly shaken off. Satine was whimpering, crying, and trying to escape him.  
  
For Satine saw what no one else did. She saw Warner pointing a gun towards them, and knew what would happen if Christian fail to leave. She turned around and tried to push him back.  
  
"Go, Go, Go......."She murmured to him. Christian just kept shoving the money at her, not listening to a word she said. 'Why won't he let me save him?' Satine thought. Christian was screaming at her, but she kept her back to Warner who was rushing towards them with the gun.  
  
Christian was desperate now. He had to know, and she wouldn't tell him, she wouldn't answer, she wouldn't even take the money!  
  
"Tell me it wasn't real! Tell me you don't love me! Tell me! Tell me you don't love me!" He screamed repeatedly at her. Satine knew he would die soon if something didn't happen. Warner rushed towards them and pointed the gun at Christian's head. "Tell me you don't love me!"  
  
A blazing white light blinded them both, as they realized they had found Satine's entrance. Warner hid behind the set, so he wouldn't be exposed like both of them. 'So close', he silently cursed.  
  
Silence consumed the theatre as the two were exposed to the audience's view. It was certainly a sight to see. The cast was wide-eyed and shocked, Christian had been yelling, Satine was crying and an extremely confused audience tried to figure out what was going on. Everyone looked around hoping a solution would present itself. Zidler took the initiative.  
  
"Ha Ha Ha!" the audience couldn't figure out what was so funny, so he continued. "I am not fooled! Though he has shaved off his beard and adopted a disguise, mine eyes do not lie. For it is he, the same penniless sitar player." The audience appeared to have gotten it, they laughed, and the cast breathed a sigh of relief. "Driven mad by jealousy." He continued. Their reaction changed to pity.  
  
Christian eyed the Duke, and remembered is purpose. He was going to make sure that Satine got the message. Christian drug her down the stairs and let go of her hand, flinging her onto the ground.  
  
"This woman is yours now." The audience may have thought that the sitar player was just projecting to them, but everyone else knew exactly who he was talking to. Christian flung the money at her and continued. "I've paid my whore."  
  
Christian could hardly keep himself from crying, as he looked down at Satine and spoke to her and her alone.  
  
"I owe you nothing." He paused, "And you are nothing to me." The tears forced their way into his vision and his voice. He knew this was the last thing he had to do.  
  
"Thank you for curing me of my ridiculous obsession with love." His emotions were so strong now, that he barely made it through the sentence. Christian couldn't bear to see her. To see her damaged and hurt, regardless of what she had done to him. He started walking. Across the landing, down the steps, onto the main floor.... he was stopped momentarily as he reached the audience. There was a rodent that needed to be taken care of.  
  
Christian glared at the Duke. The one source of all his problems, Satan himself! He would have ripped his heart out, then and there, but decided to leave him be. Satine was pain enough.  
  
So he kept walking. The reality of the situation and what he was turning his back on, never reaching him. 'And he leaves the kingdom forever.' He thought, 'That's how the story really ends.' 


	8. Chaptre Huit

Disclaimer: I don't own Moulin Rouge or any of the characters in this chapter. They all belong to Baz Luhrman.  
  
A/N: Wow! This is the longest chapter so far. Sorry it's been a while sense I last updated, but I've been on vacation for two weeks with my only access to a computer being $.50 a minute. Hope you enjoy this chapter and I will answer the "cliffhanger" soon. Happy Reading!  
  
Jinny-Gurl: Toulouse Latrec (the historical person) had knees, but John Leguizamo didn't because he had to walk on his knees for the part. Does that help any?  
  
"I owe you nothing, and you are nothing to me. " Now, I could say that those words shook me to the core, hit me like ice, stung like a million bites all over my body. But that wouldn't explain nearly well enough. The exact feeling I felt at that moment wasn't poetic pain, wasn't ironic love, wasn't elaborate or descriptive. It just hurt. Like a pain I never have felt before and hope to never feel again. Try to imagine being covered by scorpions, bees, snakes and anything that sting or bites or injects venom times one thousand, and you're nowhere near it. It just hurts.  
  
Oh; but that's not the best part, far from it. After the pain comes a numbness; a numbness which springs from the overwhelming feelings of before. Your body simply can't handle it all. The numbness makes you want to feel something, anything to believe you're still human. It hurts so much, you simply can't feel it. But at that moment, all of that meant shit.  
  
'I'm nothing to him.' I thought, 'exactly what I always really was. Nothing.' My sobs came out in short coughs, thanks to the demon crushing my lungs. Out of my blurred vision, I saw Harold. He put his hand on my arm, I think, I didn't care anymore. I couldn't feel anything, much less him. "It's for the best," he said in a vain attempt to comfort me. "Who's best?!!!!" I wanted to shout. "Who's fucking best!!!!!" I almost started my rant, but the demon kept me constrained. Harold too, my hands and lifted me up, while speaking towards the audience.  
  
"And now, my bride, it is time to raise your voice to the heavens and say your wedding vows." I stood there shaking, wondering how I could "raise my voice to the heavens" if I could barely whisper, much less see. But it didn't matter. Nothing did. There I stood a shattered and broken whore; that was all. I didn't deserve Christian and I didn't deserve love. Fuck love! Love is worth nothing. Love is so.......That was when I heard it, a voice from above.  
  
"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return!"  
  
That was all it took. The breath leapt from my throat, as I knew in my heart that something heavenly had saved me. I didn't have time to think, nor did I need to. The words found themselves.  
  
"Never knew I could feel like this" I sang over my shoulder slowly, but with a newfound strength. "Like I've never seen the sky before. Want to vanish inside your kiss, every day I'm loving you more and more." I turned into the audience's view, expecting to only see the silhouettes through the lights and my tears. But an odd thing happened. I could see one man with his back turned to me, standing in the aisle and knew I had one chance left. He turned to face me.  
  
"Listen to my heart, can you hear it sing." There was no way I would let him go. "Come back to me and forgive everything!" I gasped for air, not even caring that everyone saw. Did he believe me, could he trust me again? More importantly, would he?  
  
"Seasons may change, winter to spring. I love you. Till the end of time." Knowing I had gambled with my career, my friend's careers, their lives and my life all I could do was hope. Silence reigned in the theatre for everyone else, but all I could hear was my own heart pounding.  
  
All he had to do was say anything, or even walk away. But he just stood there, and it killed me. Then, starting quietly, I heard his wonderful voice pull me towards him, out of the underworld.  
  
"Come what may, come what may, come what may, come what may." He sang and walked towards me; all I could see was Christian. Our voices joined together in a gorgeous sound. "I will love you, until my dying day!" We had done it. We had actually done it, and he was back, mine forever, nothing could take him away. Unfortunately, Toulouse decided to intervene in our romantic moment.  
  
"They're trying to kill you!" he yelled. Well, somebody had to say it. The next events were a colorful blur to me. The stage broke out into chaos, but it all seemed in slow motion when I was looking at Christian. We had won, the artists had won, not the financier. And Zidler made sure of that. The Duke was gone, and he had nothing from his visit to Paris but a black eye. I turned to Christian and whispered in his ear.  
  
"That deserves a kiss, don't you think?" He just smiled at me. And kiss we did. The curtain closed, and the rose petals fell as we broke away. We had won, love had conquered all obstacles, and nothing could stop our love. Nothing.  
  
But I had forgotten one little detail. My life was no longer my own. Christian turned away from me towards the curtain but I kept his hand in mine. I took in a quick breath of air as I gasped and began coughing.  
  
'No!' I thought, panicking, 'Not now! Life is finally good, don't take that away from me!' I silently pleaded with God. "Please God no! No! I'm sorry. I'm so sorry! I made a mistake. Don't let me die, I promise I'll be good! He loves me, can't you see? Don't let me die now, not now!" The pain grabbed my chest again, as breathing became increasingly harder. Christian turned around and caught me just in time.  
  
I'd never been happier in my live. Love had conquered all, the Bohemian ideals had won and most importantly, I was finally with Satine. And there was no way she would ever leave me again. At least, that's what I thought. I walked towards the red curtain, through the shower of rose petals, leading Satine behind me. I felt a slight tug on my hand, but didn't think much of it, being caught up in the moment as I was. But then her hand started pulling away from my grasp. I turned around just in time to catch her. My brain frantically searched for a painless explanation; but I knew there wasn't one. Nothing like this ever came easily.  
  
I brought Satine down to the ground in my arms, and did not let her go.  
  
"Satine, Satine? What's the matter? What's the matter." I stuttered in confusion. My only response was more coughs, but I kept up my inquiry. Still Satine did not answer. Not that I really needed one, though. Somewhere in the back of my mind I knew the truth. By now a group of people had gathered a good distance around us. Bu I didn't notice any of them. How could I pay attention to the mindless drones around me when my love was dying? Satine continued coughing, producing blood at the corner of her mouth. I wiped it away with my hand, which I stared, dumbfounded at.  
  
'No, no this can't be happening.' I thought. 'God, no! I just got her back and you're taking her away from me again?!!!!!! That's not fair!!!' And indeed, it wasn't fair, but sometimes that's how things work out. I held Satine in my arms as she was shaking violently, like a frightened animal. "Somebody get some help!" I frantically yelled.  
  
"I'm sorry Christian. I'm so sorry." She repeated. What was she sorry for, she didn't do anything wrong.  
  
"It's going to be all right." I whispered; more for myself than for her. "It's going to be all right."  
  
"I'm cold" she said "I'm so cold, Christian. Hold me. Hold me." I gently lifted her into my arms attempting to do the impossible.  
  
"I love you." I said. I set her gently in front of me and she smiled; I couldn't help but smile back.  
  
"You've got to go on Christian." No, no, she wasn't leaving yet, I wouldn't let her. "I can't go on without you, though." "You've got so much to give." Satine caressed me cheek lightly as I rocked her back and forth. I cried. Tears of pain that strong cannot be held back by sheer will, so I make to attempt to.  
  
"Tell our story Christian." But I wouldn't accept a goodbye yet. Not from her, she had too much to live for. "No." "Yes, yes." I was crying and she could see my pain. Her blue eyes looked into me, so intense and bright.  
  
"Promise me, promise me." She nodded her head, as I did so reluctantly. "Yeah." There was no way I could say no to this woman. By now she was fading, and it was obvious. But what do you say to the love of your life in her last minutes living. There's nothing much you can say, but I know she understood. By now I was shaking uncontrollably, even more than she.  
  
Satine looked into my eyes and I knew this was it. I just squeezed her harder. Her frail voice echoed in my ears, "I'll always be with you."  
  
With that, she faded away. Nothing dramatic, the pain just stopped for her. But mine was just beginning. I sobbed for my lost love as I held her body in my arms. Open, racking sobs fell from my lips.  
  
"Why God did you do this to me?!!" I screamed "We just wanted love, is that a crime?!!!!" Everyone left me alone in the dark with my hatred, my Satine and my questions.  
  
As I lay in Christian's arms, looking up at his confused and contorted face I could only think of one thing. I couldn't leave Christian now; not now. I was going to cause him so much more pain than I ever meant to. Things weren't supposed to be happy. God would give us justice for all we had gone through. But he hadn't and now our lives would be ripped apart. And all I could feel was the fear that I would never live again. Never breathe fresh air, or see the sky and the water or the smile on a small child's face. Or Christian. I would never feel his warm breath on my neck or hear the poetry he wrote, or look into his loving eyes. And that scared me. Fear covered every inch of my mind as I thought back to that afternoon. Two pills in my hand, and a glass of water. That simple, that easy, barely any fight. But no, I couldn't make it that easy. And I would never be sure until the end came.  
  
The one pill was in my system and the other one..... well, the other one was in the plumbing system, I guess. I had second-guessed myself at the last minute, taken only one and now it was slowly killing me. Blackness started crowding my vision, as Christian squeezed me towards him. He slowly brought me back down, and his tears fell onto my face.  
  
"I'll always be with you." I whispered, knowing it would all end today. I said a prayer for my love as shallow breath left my lips. 'Good bye Christian. I'm sorry.' 


	9. Chaptre Neuf

Disclaimer: The usual, you know the drill. (If you were waiting for a lapse in judgment such as this to sue me, than ha ha! I win. Just look on the former pages if you care about he disclaimer.)  
  
A/N: Once again, sorry I took longer than usual but I have school and you guys aren't reviewing!!!!!!! *Whimper* please review??? Well, regardless of whether or not you review, here's the next chapter.  
  
  
  
Darkness sat around me, engulfing me, my best and only friend. And I let him in, injected him into my veins and enjoyed the results. Her body lay in my arms, her corpse; in my arms. And I wouldn't let her go. If I let her go, she might wake up without me. They came and tried to take her away from me, telling me she was dead. Dead! She wasn't dead! She was just sleeping............... 'Just sleeping'. I whispered to myself. My tired soul gave out. I couldn't pretend anymore; so I just wept.  
  
Who knows how long I sat on that stage, rocking her in my arms and crying. Could've been minutes, could've been hours, could've been days for all I cared.  
  
In the beginning they were all there, giving me pitying glances but they didn't last long. One bye one they disappeared. They left to their own relatively painless realties, away from my painful one.  
  
The Bohos were some of the last to leave, but eventually, even they left me. Zidler was still there when they weren't; I guess he felt guilty. As he should. I didn't even want to look at his face. He had betrayed all of us, especially Satine, and had gained nothing from it.  
  
But out of all of them, one stayed faithful. Toulouse. Toulouse was the last to leave. When the only noise that had filled my ears for a long while was my own breathing; I heard his footsteps. They came closer, and stopped behind me. He handed me an envelope, along with three words. "It's from her." That was it.  
  
I could feel his eyes on the back of my neck for a long time before he finally walked away. I moved the paper through my hands, and looked at it. There was one word written across it, in her beautiful script. "Christian" I was almost curious to its contents, but stuck it in my shirt pocket, swearing to look at it later. Right now I had other business to attend to.  
  
~~~~*~~~~~ ~~~~~*~~~~~ ~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
She laid on my bed, with the moonlight shining on her, almost making her glow. If only I saw the slight movement of her chest, I could make myself believe that nothing had changed. But it had; and not for the better. I had carried her up to my carried and laid her on my bed. Strange thing to do, I know, but it only seemed right. If I left her, they would take her away and I couldn't bear for that to be the last time I ever saw her. So I had taken her with me and once again, it was just the two of us in my garret, like old times. I would take her back to them tomorrow morning; but at the moment, I just needed one more night.  
  
I walked up to the bed and held her hand in mine, but quickly let go. Cold to the touch. No matter how hard I tried, I would never get the wonderful time that we had shared back. With this realization, I sunk to the floor in a depressed haze.  
  
'Why did this have to happen to me? Why did God insist on tormenting me? I was given love, it was taken away, I was given it back and it was ripped from me just as quickly. Someone up there must hate me.' Thoughts pulsed through my head as I sobbed for the millionth time that night. 'I should have never come to the damned Moulin Rouge.' I thought bitterly. 'Then I never would've gotten hurt. Father was right.' After drowning in my own bitterness and regrets for quite some time, I realized something. The letter. The letter Toulouse had handed me. It was still in my shirt pocket.  
  
I quickly got up and walked over to where I had thrown my shirt on the floor. Picking it up, I reached inside the small pocket until my fingers came into contact with paper. Slowly, carefully, I pulled the letter out. No doubt, I was curious about it's contents but in truth, the letter scared me a little. I didn't know if I could handle something from Satine to me; not tonight anyway. Regardless of the fears I had, my curiosity won and I slowly unfolded the paper. Inside were these words:  
  
My Dearest Christian,  
  
If you are reading this, I can only assume where I am. Where all whores and liars go. Where the ones that don't deserve eternal happiness go. Don't miss me; don't cry for me; even though I doubt that you will. I deserve to be where I am. I hurt you, and it wasn't fair to you. But regardless of the way you feel about me, there is something you must know. The pain I caused you was not in vain; hard to believe, but true. The Duke was going to kill you. Kill you. I knew that you would follow me wherever I went, regardless of the circumstances. Whether I was sick or well, or whether you thought I loved you or not. I knew it, Zidler knew it, Marie knew it. You know it too. The only way to save you was to break your heart and hope that you wouldn't follow me. I'm sorry. I know I can't say it enough, but I am sorry. But you don't have to worry. The Duke won't have me, I won't be his. There is now way in hell. I would never hurt you like that. That's why things must end this way. They have to. I don't want to hurt you anymore. Cyanide will be my untimely end; poison. Strange how two little pills can do so much damage. I only wonder if people will miss me and notice my absence. People who actually care about me. Not about my body, or my "talent". I hope that someone will care. I can only pray you do. I love you. Advienne Que Pourra.  
  
Satine  
  
  
  
By the time I had finished reading this, my hands were shaking, and the ink was running from my tears on the paper. Only one main thought remained in my mind.  
  
'She killed herself.' I whispered. 'She killed herself for me. And I yelled at her and abandoned her when she needed me the most.' I thought back painfully to the earlier events of that evening. "I owe you nothing, and you are nothing to me." 'I had thought that I had known everything and the only injustice in the world had been done to me. I hadn't even seen or cared about her pain. But after all that, she accepted me back and died in my arms. Died. Died for my sake.' My brain kept circling back to her voluntary sacrifice and I couldn't keep the tears from falling. I sang what popped into my head, even though I was still choking back tears.  
  
"Sad eyes follow me. But I still believe there's something left for you and me for you and me for you and me." I buried my head in my arms and tried to hide from the world.  
  
"Hold me now, I'm six feet from the edge and I'm thinking mabie six feet ain't so far down." The song had brought a fresh batch of tears to my eyes that soaked the arms of my shirt thoroughly. I fell asleep like that; crying with my head in my arms.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~ ~~~~~*~~~~~ ~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
Sunlight shone on my face, as I opened my eyes and saw her laying next to me her chest rising and falling softly. I slowly breathed a sigh of relief. It had all been just a dream, and now she was here with me. Satine moved slightly and rolled over. She sat like that for a moment, eyes closed, as I studied her face. Then her eyelids slowly opened, and a small smirk appeared on her face.  
  
"You know" she said, "I don't know if I'll ever get used to waking up with you staring at me." I just smiled right back at her, happiness emanating from me.  
  
"But you're the most beautiful thing to watch in the morning." I leaned over and moved towards her until her lips were centimeters from mine. I closed my eyes as my lips got closer and closer and ...............met with something cold and hard.  
  
I opened my eyes and realized I was laying face down on the wooden floor of my garret. I almost started crying for the deep sadness I felt at that moment. It had only been a dream. I had dreamed that I had dreamt reality. Slowly, I rose up to my feet, steadying myself on the metal frame of my bed.  
  
She was still there on my bed, with the sunlight illuminating her hair, creating a halo effect. My brain told me that I could not do this anymore, endure this torment, and she was only magnifying the pain. I would have to say goodbye. I carefully walked over to the bed and sat down on the side. Something came to my mind, the perfect goodbye. When she had first come to the Moulin Rouge as a teenager, Satine was sad and lonely. Marie became her mother and every night would sing to her. Once, Satine had taught him the lullaby.  
  
"Hush my love now don't you cry. Everything will be all right. Close your eyes and drift in dream, rest in peaceful sleep. If there's one thing I hope I showed you, hope I showed you. Just give love to all." I stared at her lovely face, and stroked her cheek lovingly.  
  
"Oh my love.in my arms tight, every day you give me life. As I drift off to your world, will rest in peaceful sleep. I know there's one thing that you showed me. That you showed me." How I wished that she could hear my song and sing with me. But I knew now that was impossible. At least she would have a proper goodbye. Tears once again filled my eyes as I sang the last words to my love.  
  
"Just give love to all. Let's give love to all." I touched Satine's fingers lightly and continued. "I know there's one thing that you showed me, I know there's one thing that you showed me, that you showed me. Just give love to all." I bent down and kissed her lips one last time. "Let's give love to all."  
  
I put on my jacket and shoes, ran my fingers through my hair in an attempt to look presentable and knew I was finally ready. I took one last look at her, put on my hat and walked to the door. I would tell Zidler where she was, and he would take care of it. I put my hand on the doorknob and turned it, walking out into the hall. The voice that filled my ears made the hair on the back of my neck stand on end.  
  
"Christian?"  
  
  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~ ~~~~~*~~~~~ ~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
A/n: OOOH! Cliffhanger! The songs used in here were Creed, "Hold me Now" and "Lullaby". 


	10. Chaptre Dix

Disclaimer: I don't own Moulin Rouge or any of the characters from it. I'm just using them for my own evil purposes. Muaaaaahahahah!  
  
A/N: Wow! This chapter took me a while to write. Well, a while compared to the other ones anyway. Yes, I know I'm the evil Queen of Cliffhangers (something like that) but I was relatively prompt in bringing you this chapter because I'm sure that it is uncomfortable on the edge of your seat. Read and enjoy!  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~ ~~~~~*~~~~~ ~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
That voice was so familiar. I wanted to find it's owner and........I quickly shook that thought out of my head. I was hearing voices. I was going crazy and that is all that there was to it. Sad really, what grief can do to people and what it had done to me. I wished that I could have had a glass of Absinthe in my hand, to write my delusions off as simply being drunk instead of insane. C'est la vie. I took two more steps, taking me once again out into the hall.  
  
"Christian?"  
  
The voice came again, making me practically jump out of my skin. It seemed more insistent this time, and I couldn't keep myself from stopping in my tracks. My eyes welled up with tears at the torment that my brain was putting me through. I took a deep breath and rubbed the tears out of my eyes. Crazy or not I had to know; so I turned around.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~ ~~~~~*~~~~~ ~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
The world focused around me as I opened my eyes and saw him walking away. His name flew out of my mouth before my mind could even think about it.  
  
"Christian?" He stopped dead in his tracks and his body stiffened. He looked as if he would turn towards me but at the last second he shook his head as if clearing it and stepped forward. Why hadn't he listened to me?  
  
"Christian?" I said, more urgently this time. If I could help it, he wouldn't leave me here alone. Once again, he stopped and took a deep breath. But this time, he turned around. My breath caught when I saw his appearance. His eyes were red and puffy from crying, and had fresh tears in them, his clothes were wrinkled and his overall appearance disheveled. Christian just stood and looked at me blankly as tears began to stream down his cheeks. He stumbled over towards the bed and fell to his knees when he reached the side of it. His voice was barely louder than a whisper when he spoke, and it seemed as if it hurt him to speak the words.  
  
"Satine?" he whispered, "Satine, is that really you, are you really there?" Christian started choking on his tears, and I just wanted to hold him and make his pain go away. "Is it really you? Because I can't take any more of this pain." He lay his head on the sheets, and I reached out a hand to stroke his hair.  
  
"Yes, Christian" I said, still very weak myself, "I'm here. You don't have to hurt anymore. I promise." He looked up at me and gave a weak smile. The next thing I knew, his lips found mine and we were locked in a passionate kiss. When we finally separated, out of breath, he looked me in the eye and grasped me hand.  
  
"I thought you were dead." He whispered and kissed me on the cheek. I returned his kiss and then some. "So did I."  
  
We lay like that in each other's arms, listening to our own hearts beating for what seemed like hours. Christian kissed my hair, and squeezed my hand.  
  
"Satine?" he asked. I turned around to face him and breathed in the scent of his shirt. "Hmmm..."  
  
"Satine" he asked again, "What happened to you?" I gave him a look of confusion. "What do you mean, Christian?" He sat up in the bed and I leaned into his chest.  
  
"When you were...when we...when I thought you were dead. What happened to you? You obviously didn't take those pills that you mentioned or you wouldn't...you wouldn't be here." Christian looked down at me, and I knew that there was no way of avoiding the question. I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply, stifling back a coughing spell.  
  
"Well..." I began, "You are right about one thing. I didn't take both of the pills" I paused and let out the breath that I had been silently holding. "I took one of them." Christian gave me a look of surprise and I had to turn my head and look away. "I took one, and I guess that it knocked me out. The last thing I remember is after the curtain fell. I...I'm sorry Christian." I turned my head into his shirt and started crying. I couldn't bear to look up at his face; I was so ashamed of my actions. But Christian seemed to not care at all. He pulled me away from his chest and gave me a very worried look.  
  
"Well, are you okay now!" He asked quickly. I smiled and nodded my head softly, but Christian didn't seem to be too persuaded. "Mabie I should get a doctor. You know, just in case." He suggested. "Christian" I began, "I really don't think that's necessary..." But Christian didn't let me finish my sentence. He quickly got up and made himself look more presentable, tucking me under the sheets. I protested and tried to get up and follow him, but Christian insisted that I stay and he would bring the doctor back. He tucked the sheets in around me, kissed me on the forehead, and smoothed back a strand of my hair.  
  
"Be back soon" he whispered, putting on his hat and leaving the room with a huge grin on his face.  
  
I leaned into the pillows and breathed in the scent that was uniquely his. Soon I was off to sleep.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~ ~~~~~*~~~~~ ~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
I awoke from my pleasant sleep coughing painfully. My whole body ached and racked with the coughing. I knew what was coming next and could feel the blood climbing up my throat. Seeing as there was no handkerchief around me, I put the sheets to my mouth to catch the blood. I frantically looked around the room for Christian but he was nowhere in sight. Slowly, the darkness crept in around me and I fell into an unconscious slumber.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~ ~~~~~*~~~~~ ~~~~~*~~~~~ Christian pulled the doctor quickly towards his garret, ignoring the man's complaints. He just wanted to see her again. Christian had felt bad already about leaving her alone and he couldn't wait to kiss her lips and touch her hair again. He ran up the flights of stairs, directly to his door, with the doctor far behind him. Christian slammed open the door, and stopped where he stood. Satine lay on the bed, with a puddle of blood next to her body. Christian ran towards her, leaving the door open, and cradled her in his arms.  
  
"Help!" he screamed, "Help! Somebody help!"  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~ ~~~~~*~~~~~ ~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
The doctor looked over Satine as I sat crumpled in a pile outside of my door. He had been there for almost an hour, and still I hadn't heard a thing. I was beginning to think that the wallpaper pattern I had been staring at was moving. Finally the door opened, and he let me in. Satine was still asleep and laying quietly on the bed when I walked in. The words came out of my mouth before I could consider them.  
  
"Is she going to be okay?" The doctor looked at me solemnly and motioned for me to sit down. I refused and told him whatever he had to tell me, he could tell me standing up. The doctor took a deep breath and began.  
  
"M. James," he began "The good news is that Mlle. Satine has not had any outstanding side effects from the cyanide that she took." Christian let out a breath that he didn't know he had been holding. "Oh thank God." He whispered.  
  
"The bad news is," the doctor continued, "I'm afraid that she is suffering from tuberculosis. That explains her unconsciousness and the blood when I arrived. I'm sorry." Christian decided that he did actually need the chair and he slumped down in it, fighting back tears.  
  
The doctor walked closer to him and pulled out a small bottle. "However, there is something that we can try. This is an experimental drug, which has seemed to suppress the coughing and spitting up of blood in other patients. It should help her and give her more time. I will leave this with you. It's three drops in a glass of water twice a day, if she decides to take it." He handed me the small glass bottle; I grasped it in my hand and paid the doctor. After he left I sat down on the end of the bed and waited.  
  
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"Christian, I want to take it if you want me to. I'll do whatever you say. If the doctor thinks that it will work than it's the best thing for me." I had to smile at her. Satine was willing to do whatever I wanted her to do, and all I wanted was the best for her.  
  
"Satine, I think you should do it if it..." I didn't want to say it, but knew that there was just no way around it, "if it gives us more time together." She just looked at me and started crying.  
  
"Oh, Chris..." I reached down and hugged her, lying down beside Satine. She laid her head on my chest, listening to my heart beating. When she finally fell asleep, I pulled the covers up around us and let myself slip off with her. To a happier time, a happier place, and a happy future. But mainly, I dreamt of a happier us. 


	11. Chaptre Onze

Disclaimer: I don't own Moulin Rouge. Never have, unfortunately never will. I do have fun with the characters, though. A/N: Sorry this took so long, but school decided to rear its ugly head. Thank you soooooo much to all of you that reviewed, you keep this story going! Read and enjoy, this is a mushy chapter!  
  
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I awoke to the wonderful sound and smell of breakfast: bacon sizzling and Christian singing. The sun was rising over Paris, the air was cool and I was alive. There is no better way, in my opinion, to start a day. As I said Christian was singing and hadn't even noticed the fact that I was awake yet. So I just remained in my pleasant position, and listened to his sweet voice.  
  
"La lune trop blême pose un diadème sur tes cheveux roux. La lune trop rousse de gloire éclabousse ton jupon plein d'trous. La lune trop pâle caresse l'opale de tes yeux blasés. Princesse de la rue soit la bienvenue dans mon coeur blessé." Satine smiled softly at the song Christian had written for her. He had even taken the time to learn more than the meager French he had known prior to coming to Monmartre.  
  
"Princesse de la rue soit la bienvenue dans mon coeur blessé." Satine spoke softly and thought about the phrase. "Princess of the streets." Well, that's what she had been when he had met her, the princess of the streets. But he was going to change that. They were going to change that. Satine pulled the covers up to her chin and listened to his sweet song.  
  
"Les escaliers de la butte sont durs aux miséreux. Les ailes des moulins protègent les amoureux. Petite mandigote je sens ta menotte qui cherche ma main. Je sens ta poitrine et ta taille fine j'oublie mon chagrin. Je sens sur tes lèvres une odeur de fièvre de gosse mal nourri. Et sous ta caresse je sens une ivresse  
  
qui m'anéantit."  
  
I got up from the small bed and walked over the window, staring at the gorgeous colors painting Paris in the morning. My lips echoed the words which he had last sung. "I feel on your lips an odor of fever...and under your caress an intoxication that destroys me." The words had been written when we were forced to hide, we were never able to be ourselves and the words rang with more truth than ever before. No longer would we ever take love for granted.  
  
"Saisons peuvent changer, hiver en le ressort. Je t'aime jusqu'à la fin du temps. Advienne que pourra, je vous aimerai jusqu'à mon jour de mort." I sang out the window. Christian's singing promptly stopped, and I heard the sound of metal on the floor. Obviously, he had not noticed I was awake. Sure enough, Christian peeked his head out and smiled at me. He walked over to me slowly and kissed my forehead.  
  
"I didn't know anyone was listening." He said quietly and squeezed me hand. Then he sang sweetly to me before turning into the kitchen. "Good morning, beautiful how was your night? Mine was wonderful with you by my side. When I open my eyes to see your sweet face it's a good morning beautiful day." He disappeared back into the small kitchen and yelled back to me. "Breakfast will be out in a minute!" We both sat down and feasted on the wonderful food he had prepared. As I sat there with him, watching Paris wake up, I knew there was no place in the world that I would rather be.  
  
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I couldn't quite explain it. Christian had been acting odd all day, and I couldn't put my finger on it. He was nervous, but pretending that he wasn't, eager while trying to appear calm and somewhat pushy. About what, I had absolutely no idea. Thankfully I had decided a week earlier that I would spend the day with one of my best friends and mother for many years of my life. Marie and I were planning on just spending a quiet day together talking and shopping, but with Christian's uncharacteristic behavior I figured we would definitely have more than the weather to talk about. After taking my medicine, I dressed in something simple but stylish, one of my favorite dresses. It was dark blue with black trim and contrary to most of my other dresses, relatively comfortable.  
  
I quickly looked up into the sky, and saw the gray clouds forming dark black ones. Momentarily, I contemplated taking an umbrella but decided against it. For a reason I had never been able to figure out, I loved the rain. It smelled wonderful, was cold and was clean. When the rain subsided, it made the streets look wonderful and smell better; it was the only thing that could improve the griminess of the world that I used to live in, and I loved it. I found Christian, gave him a quick kiss and waved goodbye, telling him I'd return by five-thirty that night. As soon as I walked out into the hall, I breathed a sigh of relief, grateful to escape the tense atmosphere of Christian's garret. I saw Marie when I walked out of the building and quickly walked over to her, ready to relax and enjoy a day of fun.  
  
"You're a life saver, Marie." I said, smiling as we walked towards one of the many stopped carriages. "I know, Satine, I know." She replied, smiling knowingly. "Now let's go enjoy ourselves."  
  
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I returned to the small garret with my arms full of boxes and a large smile on my face. The day had been a wonderful way to get away, and a delicious smell was coming from the room. I reached into a pocket and fumbled with the small key to the garret. I tried to put the key in the hole, but the wonderful stack of boxes in my arms prevented me from seeing the lock or coordinating my hand with it. Finally I gave up and knocked on my own door. Christian came to the door wearing the suit that he wore the first time we met and a huge grin. He took the boxes from my hands and opened the door, covering my eyes in the process.  
  
"What is all this about?!" I said in surprise, but my only answer was a kiss and a "you'll see." My mind was racing with questions, but I decided to let it be and let him have his fun. "Well," I started, "Since I believe that wonderful smell is a dinner you have prepared, Sir, would you be so kind as to lead me to my room so I may change into something more appropriate." Christian complied, leading me into the bedroom, shutting the door behind me, and giving me a kiss on the back of my neck.  
  
Left to myself, I began to open the boxes and pull out the beautiful items Marie had picked out for me. She had picked gorgeous designs and even more beautiful fabric as a surprise for me. I picked out a simple but beautiful forest green dress. The fabric was silk, with a horizontal neckline that wrapped around my shoulders. It was fitted in the top, and flared out every so slightly every few inches, creating a beautiful effect. I pulled my hair so it was half-back, and half down with curls falling down my back. Around my neck sat a small, golden chain with a small diamond that had been a present from Marie for my sixteenth birthday. I quietly turned the knob on the door and walked into a small room where an elegant table was set. There was delicious looking food, and two burning candles. But then, we can't forget the most important part, can we? Christian took my breath away, he was so handsome and striking. He took my hand and kissed it softly. "Enchante." He smiled and pulled me chair back for me.  
  
The rest of the evening passed so quickly. I was hypnotized by Christian, and the look he was constantly bestowing on me. Finally, dinner was finished, dessert was eaten and the table was cleared. Christian smiled softly at me, and took my hand.  
  
"Come here," he said, "I want to show you something." He guided me out onto the ledge outside of his window. Where he had written a song for me, and convinced me that our love was worth it all. All the trouble, all the problems, all the hiding. It was worth it. He put his arms around me as we watched the scene in front of us. The sun was setting over Paris, casting it in colors of pink, red and orange and a soft breeze blew. It was one of the most beautiful scenes in my life.  
  
Christian kissed my hair and whispered sweetly into my ear. "Never knew I could feel like this, like I've never seen the sky before. Want to vanish inside your kiss, everyday I love you more and more. Listen to my heart, can you hear it sing telling me to give you everything. Seasons may change winter to spring; I love you until the end of time." Christian squeezed my hand gently and reached into his pocket. He walked in front of me and got down on one knee. He opened his hand to reveal a gold bracelet with a small heart attached to it. The heart was engraved with two smaller hearts and a vine entwining them. He opened the heart slowly and placed the piece of paper inside it into my hand. My shaking hands opened the folded piece of paper to see three words in his beautiful handwriting. "Advienne Que Pourra?"  
  
Come What May. Those three words were all that were needed. I nodded my head in response as I spoke with tears, "Je vous aimerai jusqu'à mon jour de mort." He clasped the bracelet onto my wrist and stood up. We smiled at each other as tears fell down my cheeks. Christian wiped them away and kissed me softly. Not that I would let him get away with 'softly'. I returned the kiss and much more, a wonderful joy pulsing through me. Christian and I would be married.  
  
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Hope you liked it! Need help understanding the French in here? Go to  
  
http://babelfish.altavista.com/tr 


	12. Chaptre Douze

Disclaimer: I don't own Moulin Rouge, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.........you get it.  
  
A/N: So sorry that this took forever to update, school and all. Hope I haven't lost all my readers yet, oh well. Read and enjoy!  
  
  
  
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Christian lay on his bed next to Satine, just watching the moonlight on her face. He loved doing that, watching how the moonlight made her skin glow and even though she was a gorgeous woman, something about the moonlight made her look like a goddess. He kissed her on the cheek and settled down again next to her, wrapping his arms around Satine lovingly. Christian started thinking about what life would be like for both of them together forever, come what may. He closed he eyes and had almost drifted off to sleep into his happy dreams when he noticed something. Underneath his embrace, Satine had started moving slightly and was breathing heavily. Christian put his hand on her, with an attempt to comfort her, but to no avail. Satine began tossing and turning, twisting herself up into the sheets. With a worried look on his face, Christian tried to wake her.  
  
"Satine" he whispered in a soft tone "sweetheart, it's alright, shhh...shhh...it's all right." To his dismay, Satine continued to thrash and started mumbling incoherently. Just at that moment Satine sat up straight in bed and screamed in a horrible high pitched tone. Christian was holding her in a moment, rocking her back and forth and whispering in her ear. When he had finally calmed her down and her breathing became normal again, he turned to her and looked into her frightened eyes, "Satine," he said "what's wrong, what were you dreaming about?" Satine averted his gaze and stared at the moonlight shining on the floor. He looked at her in confusion for a moment and stroked back her hair. He softly brought her eyes back to him and looked at her questioningly. "Satine" he said, more sternly this time "what happened." She just stared right back at him, her ice blue eyes chilling him momentarily as she answered in a dark tone.  
  
"We have to leave now."  
  
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The next day, after Christian had left for the bakery, Satine sat herself down on the bed to think about what had happened the night before. The dream had started like a normal, wonderful, romantic dream of her and Christian. They had been walking through the park in late afternoon, enjoying the scenery and each other's company in general. They had brought along a picnic basket and were going to share a wonderful dinner together, as the sun set. They had gotten half way through their meal when Christian said that he needed to leave to get something and he would be back in a few minutes. It having been a dream, Satine accepted this statement with no questions, they kissed and Christian walked off to wherever it was he was off to.  
  
Satine decided that sense she had a few minutes alone, she would take time to enjoy the scenery. She closed her eyes and breathed in the scent of dusk in the park. She listened to the birds singing their beautiful, lyrical tunes and enjoyed the last feeling of warmth the sun provided before it disappeared behind the hills. Just as she was taking in this moment, icy hands grabbed her shoulders forcefully. Satine need not turn around to know who was behind her, but the nasally voice confirmed what she was already sure of.  
  
"At last, my dear" it spoke "I have found you. You didn't really think that I wouldn't find you, did you?" she turned around to face the Duke, with a horrified look. He glanced down at her, with an amused look on his face. "Oh, you did. How adorable." The Duke leaned down to kiss her forehead and Satine tore away from his grasp. "Christian!" she yelled, but no answer. "Christian!" she yelled louder and more frantically this time. "Don't you understand, my dear" the Duke spoke, "I own you, you are mine. You don't belong to Christian anymore; he won't come for you." A cynical smile appeared on the Duke's face. "Or mabie he will...then, I will get the luxury of eliminating that nuisance myself." At that moment, she saw Christian running towards her. Satine started to move towards him but the Duke pulled a gun out and pointed it at her, which made Christian run even faster. When he got close enough, the Duke swung the gun around towards Christian and pointed at his head. Satine tried to run to Christian, to put herself in the way of the bullet, but his words stopped her. "Satine, no!" he yelled "run, run now Satine and don't look back. Don't worry, I'll always be with you." The Duke pulled the trigger and Christian fell to the ground. She resisted the urge to run towards him, and started running away from the Duke. As Satine ran, his words echoed through her head, "You can run, Satine" he yelled after her, "But I'll always find you."  
  
With that last remark, I woke up screaming and had to be calmed down by Christian for several minutes. After that, I couldn't bring myself to sleeping again. The nightmare was still fresh in my mind as Christian opened the door to the garret and walked over to me.  
  
"Christian, we need to talk..." I started, but he stopped me. "No, Satine. About last night, are you sure that you want to leave? All of our friends are here...and Harold and Marie." I stood and walked quickly over to him and put my arms around his waist.  
  
"Christian, I don't want to leave them either but...the Duke. He'll find me, he'll find us. Last night I had a nightmare where the Duke found me, he killed you and he promised that he would always find me no matter where I went. Christian, I don't want to live in this fear anymore, I want to leave." My eyes started tearing up and I dug my head into Christian's chest. Christian still looked reluctant, but I knew that if I wanted to leave badly enough he would follow me to the ends of the earth. I looked down at the floor and back to his eyes, wrapping my arms more tightly around his waist and started singing softly.  
  
"To what do I owe this gift my friend? My life, my love, my soul? I've been dancing with the devil way too long and it's making me grow old, making me grow old. Let's leave...oh let's get away, get lost in time where's there's no reason left to hide. Let's leave...oh let's get away, run in fields of time where there's no reason left to hide." Christian kissed me softly, and I ran my fingers through his hair and continued.  
  
"What are you going to do with your gift dear child? Give life, give love, give soul? Divided is the one who dances for the soul is so exposed, so exposed. Let's leave...oh let's get away get lost in time, where there's no reason left to hide. Let's leave...oh let's get away, run in fields of time, where there's no reason left to hide. No reason to hide."  
  
Christian smiled at me softly and shook his head slightly. "Alright, you've won me over" he said "but where do you want to go?"  
  
"Go?" I said, confused. I hadn't had the freedom to go wherever I chose in a long time and just the concept momentarily perplexed me.  
  
Christian laughed quietly as he spoke, kissing my forehead. "Then I suggest we get a map."  
  
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Hope you liked it, even though it was a little shorter than usual. The song was "Hide" by Creed on their 'Weathered' CD. It's an awesome, CD, honestly go buy it. 


	13. Chaptre Treize

Disclaimer: I don't own Moulin Rouge or it's characters...blah blah blah. Hopefully, you get the point.  
  
A/N: I'm so sorry if anyone out there followed this story and it just disappeared. I'm doing what I always got mad at other authors for doing, aah! Well, hopefully this one was worth the wait, enjoy!  
  
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Satine looked down at the gaudy white lace bunched on the floor around her with quiet disgust. "What about this one?" Marie asked excitedly. Satine had to try hard not to laugh at the enthusiasm her friend and "mother" bestowed upon the horrific dress that she was trying on. They were looking for a wedding dress and so far hadn't had much luck in that field. Everything was either disgusting, boring, itchy, suffocating or just plain gaudy; like the one she was currently surviving. At the beginning of the day, the concept of looking for a wedding dress had been an enjoyable one. But by this point, Satine had to admit that she didn't care if she walked down the aisle in a can-can dress.  
  
'If only Christian were here.' She thought. 'Then he would save me from this shop and these dresses and we would ride off into the sunset...' Satine was quickly brought out of her dream world by Marie tapping her on the shoulder and shoving another dress into her arms. Satine silently prayed that she could make it through the rest of the shopping expedition without killing herself, or someone else.  
  
"Hmm..."she responded distractedly "What? Oh.....um..." Satine looked down at the next pile of fabric in her arms. This one happened to be light green, slightly iridescent and covered in bows. Dejectedly, she glanced around the store looking for any excuse to not wear the horrible green dress. Her eyes passed over many dresses of various shapes and colors. Blue, green, white, yellow, pink, purple...none of them caught her eye. But at that moment, she saw something hiding in the corner. Walking over to the rack Satine pulled out a creme colored silk dress. The fabric shimmered slightly with a gold color in the light pouring in the open shop window.  
  
Carefully examining it, Satine saw that it had small pearls sewn into the fabric of the skirt at random intervals, so as to only accent the dress. Practically running behind the dressing screen, Satine went to try on the gorgeous dress. Slowly, apprehensively, Satine walked out to look in the mirror. The dress seemed as if the dressmaker had had her and only her in mind while making it. The top of the dress was modestly cut down, and the silk sleeves came into a point where a loop connected to her finger. The skirt flowed gently to the ground where the train blossomed out forming almost a circle with the rest of the skirt. Seeing herself in the mirror, Satine unconsciously took in a sharp breath. This was it; they did not need to look anymore. Without even saying anything, Marie had agreed with Satine: the dress was beautiful and even more so on Satine.  
  
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Christian sat at his typewriter, with his fingers on the keys, staring at the blank sheet of paper. He had been sitting there for over an hour, trying to force some form of poetry out of his tired brain. The bright day was slowly bleeding into a beautiful sunset over Paris, but even that natural miracle could not inspire him. He needed Satine. Sitting back in his chair, Christian sighed loudly.  
  
"Where is she?" he mumbled distractedly, "she should have been back by now. I just want to hold her, and talk to her. I haven't seen her since this morning." Christian's loving thoughts toward his soon to be wife quickly turned into protective paranoia. 'What if something happened on the way home' he thought 'it's getting dark outside, and it was only her and Marie traveling alone. What if someone found them? What if she was in trouble? What if there was a problem and he hadn't been there to help her?'  
  
In his panic, Christian turned and quickly saw a glance of his hysteric self in the small mirror he owned. For a few seconds he stopped, frozen as the serious emotions he had been feeling melted away. Christian saw just how humorous he actually looked. Silently laughing at himself, he settled calmly back in his chair to look out onto Paris. The sky had turned from pink orange to a dark purple blue.  
  
'Still' he mused, 'I wish she were here now. Then she could save me from this boredom and this writers block and we could walk into the sunset...well, the fading sunset.' A sound breaking the silence that had been formerly occupying the room jarred him from his train of thought. Christian jumped up startled and relieved as his door unlocked and opened. He ran over to Satine, knocking the box out of her hand, where Marie quickly caught it, and he hugged her tightly. Satine had expected a friendly welcome, but this was a little much.  
  
"Christian? What's gotten into you?" she giggled. Christian didn't answer; he just kept hugging her and kissing her neck. "Not that I don't appreciate this but, hello would have done. However, I think I'll take advantage of this interesting situation." Satine tipped her head up slightly and made her mouth meet Christian's. Clearly enjoying it as much as she was, he deepened the kiss and they didn't break apart until both were in strong need of a deep breath. Pulling away, Satine saw that Christian's lips had almost as much lipstick on them as hers did; and she quietly giggled at him. He just looked back at her, perplexed, causing Satine to shake her head slightly.  
  
"Don't worry, sweetie, I love you just the way you are." Satine said while kissing his forehead lightly. She turned a slight shade of pink when she saw that Marie was still standing in the doorway, holding her dress. Watching Satine's reaction, Christian turned his head in the same direction but instead of noticing Marie, he saw the box in her hands.  
  
"Is that...?" he said while reaching towards the box with one hand, "yes, yes it is. However, you are not allowed to see it until the wedding." Satine responded slyly. She giggled slightly at Christian's pouting face and turned back to Marie.  
  
"Marie, I trust you to keep this safe" she glanced quickly back at Christian before continuing, "and away from Christian's grasp." "Of course." Marie responded with a smile, hugging Satine. "I'll see you two soon. Behave yourself." Satine just winked back at her. "Oh, Marie, you know we will."  
  
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Hope everyone enjoyed. I definitely wanted a fully fluff chapter and here it is. A little short, but fluffy. 


	14. Chaptre Quatorze

Disclaimer: I don't own Moulin Rouge, or the characters or the setting or any other part of all that cool junk.  
  
A/N: Muahahahahaha! I got to write that suspense that I wanted. Don't get me wrong, mushiness is great, but snags in the happy parts of the plot are just plain fun. Enjoy!  
  
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A fog swept along the ground, around the buildings and the people of Montmartre. The fresh mist created a stark contrast between its own natural beauty and the bright lights of the village. Christian sat watching it, entranced, on the balcony of his garret. The night was new, it was only around eleven, but already everyone in the village was engulfed in sleep; everyone in the village, except for him. Christian was nervous. Nervous about Satine, nervous about himself, nervous about Satine and himself. But most of all, he was nervous about the wedding. The wedding was to take place the next morning; it was to be simple, not much decoration or many people but he was still nervous. Doubts crept around Christian's brain like the fog that crept around the city.  
  
'What if she realizes that I truly am not good enough for her, that she deserves better. What if we can't leave Paris in time, and what if I can't keep her safe.' At the last thought, Christian involuntarily shivered. All he really wanted was to love Satine the best he could and keep her safe; what if he failed? If he failed in protecting Satine, he knew he wouldn't be able to live with himself. Something broke his gaze of the dark city. Christian's attention snapped back to the village.  
  
Something moved in the shadowy mist outside. Something moved quickly in the night, creating swirls of mist that followed them. Slowly, the figure stepped out where the light from the street lamps could find him and then he darted back into the darkness as quick as he had come in. The figure had been in the light for only a second, but Christian had no doubt of whom he had seen. He looked back quickly at Satine, asleep soundly in their bed. Christian's heart began to beat faster as his breathing sped up; the Duke. He had found them, and his worst fears suddenly became valid.  
  
Christian fought two impulses in his body; to keep Satine safe, and hide under the covers with her, and to watch the figure, making sure he was really coming for them. But as much as he wanted to run to protect Satine, Christian was glued to the window. He watched as the figure stepped into one light after another, slowly bringing his path toward the building Christian currently resided in. The Duke came closer and closer and finally looked up into the window where Christian sat. He ducked his head behind the shutters to keep from being seen, but wasn't altogether sure if he had been successful. Christian paused for a moment, his mind frozen. Reality finally smacked him upside the head and Christian got up to dart over to Satine. Somehow, he had been beaten; the Duke now stood in front of the door to the garret, between Satine and himself. Satine was still sleeping peacefully, despite the danger that loomed directly over her.  
  
'Probably better', Christian thought. He stared straight at the Duke, and shouted. "Stay away from her! Satine is not yours, she'll never be yours! She loves me!" The Duke said nothing, but his hand moved towards his jacket in response. Quickly, he pulled out a gun and pointed it straight at Christian. Christian glanced down at the peaceful Satine, she hadn't even been woken up.  
  
"It won't do you any good. You can shoot me if you want, but Satine will always love me." Christian spoke in a calm, steady voice, despite the shakiness he felt inside. The Duke only smirked at Christian and turned his gun towards Satine.  
  
"You are right, you know. It wouldn't do much good to shoot you because for some reason she would still have some attachment towards you. The question is, will you always be able to love her?" In a quick motion, the Duke pulled the trigger on the gun aimed at Satine's head. Despite his attempts, Christian could do nothing to save her now, it was hopeless. He openly cried out, not caring how he sounded or appeared.  
  
"Now for the final touch. I am glad I could be here to do this myself." Christian saw the Duke turn towards him and pull the trigger again, not that he cared; he was happy to join Satine. Christian felt himself fall forward as the bullet hit him and he saw the floor coming towards him...  
  
"Ooof!" Christian hit the floor with a loud smack and began rolling. He kept his eyes closed, for fear of the sight that might greet him, if he opened his eyes. Strange, he didn't feel pain anywhere, but death often did that to people, he assumed. Christian lay there on the ground for several minutes, afraid to move.  
  
"Christian?" A silky voice called, "Christian, where are you?" He immediately recognized the voice as Satine's and opened his eyes. Christian looked down and saw absolutely nothing but down; he saw the street below him, with people and carriages moving by. If he was afraid to move before, this time he was terrified.  
  
"Christian!" The voice called again. "Oh my...Christian!" Hands grabbed him from behind and pulled him away from the air below him. "Satine!" He said, glancing at her face. "Satine, you're alive." She looked at him concerned. "Yes, but you almost weren't going to be, for a moment." "What are you talking about..." he began. Satine silenced him by pointing to where he had been laying a moment ago. Christian looked around and saw what had happened. The whole event had been a dream; just a dream. He had fallen asleep, on his windowsill and dreamt he was shot. He had actually fallen out onto the narrow ledge and rolled to the complete edge of it, where his head hung off the side. Christian took in a sharp breath when he realized how close a call it had actually been. In reality, he had almost died.  
  
"I'm so sorry Satine...I'm sorry...I fell asleep next to the window...I dreamt that...." Satine put a finger over his lips, then removed her hand and put her lips where it had been. "Shhh...."she whispered, "it's all right. You're all right now, it's not your fault." Each hugged the other tightly.  
  
Realizing how silly they must look standing out on a ledge in the dark, they both moved inside. Both were shaking from the event that had just occurred and from the cold outside. Satine went through the window first, but before he followed, Christian looked out at his surroundings. Christian saw that it was early morning, the sun was just beginning to start its journey into the sky. Carefully, Christian climbed back inside, through the window. Satine pulled him towards the bed and wrapped herself up in the covers. He was about to follow her, but something pulled his gaze back outside. Christian could have sworn that he had seen a man, moving among the newly created shadows, around the buildings; then again, mabie it was just his imagination. Shivering slightly, he closed the shutters and climbed in bed next to Satine.  
  
"We'd better get back to sleep," he murmured, kissing her hair, "we both have a busy day today."  
  
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	15. Chaptre Quinze

Disclaimer: I don't own Moulin Rouge or the characters or the sets or the elephant...hmm...my guess is you get the point by now.  
  
A/N: Thank you sooooo much to those who reviewed when I *ahem* didn't post anything *ahem* for a while. You guys are great, hope you enjoy this chapter even though it's short.  
  
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"Oh Marie!" Satine gasped after rotating around slowly and seeing herself in the mirror for the first time since she had first bought her wedding gown. "Marie, I feel like a princess! This dress is absolutely gorgeous. I hope Christian will like it. Marie, I'm so lucky to be engaged to a man like him." A huge grin lit up Satine's face as she smiled broadly. "I think you've got it wrong, love. He's lucky to be engaged to a woman like you, and you should feel like a princess because that's what you are. That's what you've always been. And one more thing, you're rambling again." Satine laughed quietly and slowly glided over to the simple chair in the corner of the room, absent-mindedly playing with one of the strands of pearls in her hair. "Thank you. You know I appreciate everything you've ever done for me, I love you and I'll miss you so much." The two hugged for a moment or two and slowly drew apart. Marie looked at Satine with a motherly glance and fixed a stray strand of her dark red hair. "It's time." She said quietly before exiting the room quickly to avoid her tears being exposed to the young woman. Satine drew a quick breath and looked in the mirror before turning around and leaving the room.  
  
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Christian idly fiddled with his dress shirt collar; it had been so long since he had last worn one of these. Christian's thoughts unintentionally turned back to past events when he had been forced to wear a nice shirt and suit and be a "presentable young man". But now was different for him, now it was voluntary, now it was worth it. Christian's heart began to beat faster as he thought about how long he must have been standing where he was, waiting for the ceremony to begin and waiting to see Satine. Marie and Satine had been hiding the wedding dress from him, he knew it and he couldn't wait to see what she looked like.  
A soft, gentle light seemed to appear in the doorway of the small room he was standing in and Satine slowly began walking towards him. Anticipating what she would look like was nothing close to what he was experiencing now and tears began to well up in Christian's eyes. His heart began to beat insanely fast, his eyesight got blurry and the breath left his throat all at once. No poetic thought or song filled his mind or left his lips. There was simply a profound aura of awe surrounding the young man. Christian could barely keep his legs from giving up on him as Satine walked closer to him.  
  
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My heart began to pound quicker in my chest as I neared Christian, the train on my gown trailing behind me. As a stared at his irresistible face and into his eyes I realized that there was no doubt. No doubt in my mind whatsoever that this was the man I would spend the rest of my life with, no matter how long that may prove to be. I was no longer scared. No longer scared of my life, of what it held, of who it held waiting for me because I knew there would never be, could never be anyone else. I felt clean and forgiven, finally, cleansed by my true love. Tears started to swell in my eyes as I got closer and closer to my love. I was truly ready.  
  
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"...As long as you both shall live." Strong words came from Christian, despite the shakiness he was feeling inside. "I do." He said while staring into Satine's eyes. He watched Satine as she listened to the words of the man marrying them. He was confident in that moment, that there was no one else he could ever live with, ever love but her.  
"...In sickness and in health as long as you both shall live." Her crimson lips parted and she also spoke confidently towards Christian, looking into his eyes. "I do." Christian grinned softly at Satine, making her insides melt and warming her heart.  
"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride." The two slowly moved towards each other and kissed softly, at first that is. Christian put his arm around Satine and dipped her low, deepening the kiss. When the two finally parted, a tension that neither knew existed dropped from between them. They smiled widely at each other as they both experienced something that they had never felt before. Utter and complete freedom. 


	16. Chaptre Seize

Disclaimer: I don't own Moulin Rouge or any of the characters, or sets, or costumes, or actors...ahem...anyway. *sniff* don't worry, I'll get over it. Just read my story. ;)  
  
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Slowly I watched all of the things that had surrounded me since childhood melt away as the train picked up speed. I exhaled a long held breath as one thought filled my mind. Finally. Finally, after all this time, I am leaving. A simple human right that I never once thought possible in my suffocating life. Well, I never thought it was possible until I met Christian, that is.  
  
I turned my head to look at Christian, now asleep but still holding onto my hand as if for dear life. It was that grip that had saved me, pulling me from the depths of the underworld and into the dream I now occupy. The life I'm living seems even more surreal viewed from a speeding train. I watch Paris fade away as my husband and I-my husband!-fly towards our new home.  
  
This place I will call home often filled my dreams as a child, especially after I visited it with my family. At the time I was very young, may be only five, but the place certainly had an effect on me. It was the last happiness I was allowed before great tragedy befell my family and me. Four months after our vacation to the shore, my mother, Chantal, died giving birth to my younger sister Jacqueline. Poor Jacqueline only lasted six days before she left to join her mother, in the land that knows no pain. But for some reason, the sorrow did not end there. Almost a year later my older brother, Jean, died of tuberculosis leaving his new bride Madeleine alone in the world.  
  
Tears well up in my eyes as I think of Madeleine's face when it happened and the grief she carried with her long afterward. I blot my eyes with my handkerchief and steal a glance at my sleeping husband. Silently I swear that I will never let that happen, never leave him alone in the world like Jean left Madeleine and I softly kiss his forehead.  
  
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The steady rocking movement of the train caused me to fall asleep almost as soon as we sat down. There was nothing that could keep me from a peaceful slumber any longer. We were leaving the Moulin Rouge and the Duke, we were finally free to love and enjoy it, so I fell asleep holding Satine's hand. My dreams gave me a security of what the furture could hold. Through the fog of my sleeping mind I saw images as clearly as if I was living them. There, in front of me was Satine, sittin gon a chair in our new house, knitting.  
  
"Satine," I asked, "why are you knitting? You never told me you could knit." She put down her knitting into her lap and looked at me matter-of- factly. "Well, our baby will need a blanket, won't he? Or she?"  
  
"Our baby?" I asked, confused. "Yes, our baby silly. Don't tell me you've forgotten."  
  
The images passed on to reveal a very pregnant Satine standing next to me. "Christian!" she said. "Put your hand right here, you can feel the baby kick!" Christian moved his hand where he was told. "Do you feel it?" He smiled and the pictures again flashed forward. There was Satine on a bed, sweaty and flushed holding a moving newborn in her arms.  
  
"Christian, Christian..." she said, getting my attention, "You're a father." Satine smiled sweetly. "She has your eyes."  
  
Christian smiled once again and waited for the images to move on, to see the rest of their future, but the image faded into black. Panicked, Christian searched everywhere for his love. "Satine!" he yelled "Satine!" there was no answer for a moment. "Satine, where are you, come back!" the only reply was the piercing sound of a baby's shrieks.  
  
A whistle blowing and Satine nudging him on the shoulder awoke Christian. "Chris...wake up, we're here!" She said excitedly. "We're where?" Christian asked, his brain still fogged by sleep. "Marseilles!"  
  
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A/N: Well, there it is. Another chapter. I hope that that wasn't too terribly confusing for you, with all the dream sequences, memories and such. This chapter is dedicated to Elsa for reading it on the way up to Ashland, Oregon. (Go Shakespeare festival!) Don't worry, Steph and Kim, the fic in general is dedicated to you guys. And thanks soooooooooo incredibly much for reviewing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 


	17. Chaptre DixSept

Disclaimer: As always, I don't own or theoretically, have permission to use these characters. Ha! I am anyway! Don't sue or take other forms of legal action, for I am not willing to part with my bingo winning money and have no job.  
  
A/N: Cool! This story's been on the site for over a year...hey wait, I'm still not done yet? Oh dear, well, I best get working. Thanks so much for the reviews and if you like this story and happen to like "Pirates of the Caribbean" also, go read my other story. Please? Thanks and I hope ya enjoy!  
  
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Satine stepped off of the train and into Marseilles, filling her restricted lungs with the fresh, ocean air. Memories of childhood and happiness came wafting back on the sea breeze sending comforting feelings to her head as she squeezed Christian's hand. The young man tightened his grip, squeezing back and turning to smile at his wife. They had finally made it, and it was time to celebrate. With absolutely no warning at all, Christian dropped their luggage, turned to Satine and picked her up. Despite her protests he spun her around quickly, laughing and smiling, drawing a few curious looks and knowing smiles from the surrounding crowd. Finally he set his wife back on her feet and kissed her, while steadying her with his free hand. A large, unrestrained smile appeared on Satine's face as she ran her fingers through his hair and then straightened out her skirts in an attempt to recover her dignity.  
  
"What was that about?" She asked, laughing as Christian picked up their luggage and acted as if nothing at all had happened. "Oh, just a short burst of energy." Turning his head and flashing a quick smile, Christian began walking down the platform trailed by Satine. Seeing the look on his love's face couldn't help but bring back thoughts of his first arriving in Paris, only months before. He had been full of excitement, wonder and hope that anything could and would happen if he just believed. If he just believed in love. And, it so happens that everything had actually worked out in a way he could have only dreamed of. Looking back at Satine's blue eyes, Christian saw exactly what it meant to be in love. She had packed up her life and everything she had ever known to follow him to the ends of the earth. All right, fine. Not to the ends of the earth, but to a completely different life in a brand new place.  
  
"So, where exactly are we looking for again?" he asked dropping his silent study of the stunning creature next to him. "Hmm?" Christian laughed inwardly as Satine didn't even turn to look back at him. "Where are we going? Unless you'd like to stay here of course." Unfortunately for Christian, his sarcasm didn't seem to reach Satine. "Oh, it doesn't matter one bit to me. I would be content to walk this city until morning, or sleep on a bench, or on the sand..." The sentence that she had begun to speak just quickly trailed off as Satine continued to stare wonderingly at all surrounding her, unable to drink it all in.  
  
"Well, love, as much as I wouldn't mind wandering the streets until morning, as long as I'm with you, I am the one carrying the bags." Christian stopped and changed the multiple positions of the luggage he was lugging, as if to emphasize his point. For a moment Satine was brought back to reality and she smiled at him, grabbing a suitcase from the sidewalk and kissing his cheek. "You're right. I believe the building we're looking for is just a few blocks down that way. Number 327, I think." Satine breathed in another long lungful of the sea air before continuing beside her husband. "Yes, this way."  
  
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Footsteps echoed on the wooden floor of a long, yellow hallway as the two got closer to their new home. The petite landlady walking briskly in front of them stopped at the fourth door on the right in the long string of identical doors and stuck the key in the lock, struggling with it for a moment.  
  
"Darn door always did give me problems..." she mumbled, embarrassed, while fumbling with the doorknob and attempting to open the door. Finally, after several tries, it gave way and opened to an adequately sized main room.  
  
"Oh, Christian, it's perfect!" Satine said, while walking into the barely furnished beige flat. Looking around, Christian saw that it was not grand, but was indeed a large improvement upon his accommodations in Paris. There was the good-sized main room, which had a fireplace, a window looking out towards the ocean and well...a fireplace. Then there was a tiny kitchen, connecting the main room and an extremely small bedroom with one bed and a dresser that almost didn't fit. Despite it all though, Christian knew exactly why Satine was so excited. It may be tiny but it was theirs. He put he arm around her waist and pulled her closer to him as he spoke. "You're right, it is perfect." The young landlady stood looking down at the key in her hand and twirling a strand of her brown hair on her finger, trying not to be impolite. Clearing her throat to grab their attention, but still looking down at her feet, the woman began talking.  
  
"Payment will be collected on the third of each month, no earlier, no later unless under special circumstances." She turned her attention back toward the two and smiled a small, sweet smile at the couple. "Here is the key, Mr. James. If you need anything, my name is Ms. Sorrells and my room is the first door on the left." Christian returned her smile and put out his hand, taking hers and placing a small, short kiss on it. "Thank you." The young woman blushed and quickly handed him the key, turning around and shutting the door behind her. They heard her quickened footsteps echo in the hallway outside. Satine gave Christian a look of mock-shock and amazement as she spoke.  
  
"Why Christian, I do believe you startled the poor woman. We may not be seeing her again for quite a while. Although, I don't think I'll miss the competition." She smirked at him and wrapped her long arms around his neck. "Don't worry dear, in my book, no one could compete with you." He returned, kissing her firmly on the lips.  
  
"Christian, dear, I hate to ruin the moment" Satine spoke, pulling out of his tight grasp, "but where exactly are we going to eat?"  
  
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Candlelight filled the dim room, creating shadows on the wall and flickering in the small breeze. In front of the candle set so unceremoniously on the floor, were Christian and Satine lounging comfortably on top of a few pillows with her head resting in his lap. Two dirty dishes covered in half eaten food sat across from the two, on the other side of the lone candle. Obviously, they had found somewhere to eat after all. And also obviously, they had quickly lost interest in the food. Christian absentmindedly took one of the scarlet curls decorating Satine's ivory shoulders and began wrapping it around his finger, entranced by its softness.  
  
Silence had reigned in the small, cozy room for quite some time as they had both sat and watched the fire, enjoying each other's company. While the silence had been filling the room though, Satine's mind was filled with thoughts. Thoughts about Christian, thoughts about herself and thoughts about her past and their future together echoed in her mind. They bounced around the inside of her brain, begging to be let out. Finally, the silence became too much for her and she turned her face up to Christian.  
  
"Christian" she began slowly. "Hmm..?" he responded, looking down into her sapphire eyes and continuing to play with her hair. "Christian, you do want a family don't you? I mean, do you want to have children anytime...soon?" The red curl fell from Christian's hand as his mouth hung open slightly. Satine wasn't normally this blunt...about anything, much less something like this. He quickly closed his mouth; aware of the look he would receive should he keep it hanging down.  
  
"Well..." his voice was shaky as he first began speaking. They had never really talked about this before. Not in the terms of being a real possibility, anyway. His heart was beating wildly and Christian was aware the something profoundly stupid was about to leave his mouth and probably without his own permission. "Of course I want to have a family but..." The rest of the reply and luckily for Christian, most of the stupid part was lost as he looked down into her loving face. He sighed and smiled softly. "Yes, I do want a family. Especially with you, and especially when we have something this wonderful going for us. Whenever you're ready, I would love to start a family with you." Satine smiled back at him and then turned to look into the fire, once again letting silence reign in the room. All that could be heard was the soft noise of the ocean crashing onto the beach.  
  
With almost no warning, Satine shot straight up from the floor, causing herself to sit in an upright position. She smiled seductively at him. "Christian." She leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. "I'm ready." With that comment, he was on his feet and holding Satine in his arms. "Well then," he said while walking towards the tiny bedroom, "I would hate to leave a lady waiting."  
  
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Hehe. Hoped this chapter was thoroughly enjoyed by all, I sure liked writing it. And Steph, I hope you found the two references that were just for you! Read and Review!! 


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